Zack/21/New Jersey/Moderately Funny

me: thinks about u
my heart: :o 💖✨💫💕💘⭐️💝🌟💚🌟💛✨💫💕💕💫💘⭐️🌟💗💝💓💛💕💖
me: they hurt me!! I'm gonna be distant! that'll show them!
them: hey
me: hey 💘💓💖💕💓💞💕💗💝💓💞💝💘💕💕💖💗💘💕💞💘💘💖💗💘💞💕💞💞💕💘💕💖💗💖💕💞💞💖💖💗💖💘💞💫

that-one-irish-idiot:

bravadopinfire:

shieldposts:

Me: *shows basic human decency to cashier

Cashier: ??!?! Thank you! You’re the nicest person ever!

Me: are you ok

Reblog if politeness to retail and service workers is important to you.

honestly 

excessively-english-little-b:

valentineart89:

whoreablejewess:

babyanimalgifs:

I didn’t know cheetahs meow I’ve always thought they roar my whole life has been a lie

Ok but the other one is purring so hard

If I ever don’t reblog this assume I’m dead

Fun fact: technically, because of its inability to roar and its ability to purr, the cheetah is not a ‘big cat’ (or Great Cat) - they are still classified as Lesser Cats.

Also you haven’t heard anything until you hear them cheep.

Me in two sentences.

Me: I won't get jealous I won't get jealous I won't get jealous I won't get jealous I won't get jealous
Me: Who's this fucking whore

asstroids:

Strugglin from the womb to the tomb

me: *does weird things when home alone*
me: I bet there's hidden cameras

during sex

<p> <b>husband:</b> why are u laughing<p/><b>me:</b> thought of a meme<p/></p>